I'm the Messenger

Teisha in Bend

January 2004

I'm the messenger. The song is the message and I'm the messenger. My earliest memories of singing are in the car in my mom's car.  My mom and I used to drive around a lot in her car. It was a yellow Karmen Ghia and it was the only car we had from the time I was born until I was 18  so I kind of grew up in the same seat of this car..  It had the best radio.  No static and always in range.  We would drive around and listen to the radio and I think from a really young age I just loved to sing songs just any song, every song actually,I wanted to sing every song I didn't like it if I didn't know the song and every jingle commercial jingle and every tune I wanted to be able to sing every tune could actually, in high school, for awhile, I could almost sing every song I'd heard have a contest with my friend and we'd each push a radio station alternatively the other person picked the station on the radio and you had to sing whatever was on there and you'd go until somebody didn't know the song I'm still learning this with guitar butI think the first thing is you have to know you have to really know your songs, your material and then, you have to stop knowing them sort of you have to know where you know the lyrics so well that then you just aren't thinking about knowing anymore you're not thinking about the melody, you're just trying to sing it like... from the time you first learn a song until about (I don't know) the 25th time.Until I really know it well, there's a wonderful space where it's really new you know, it's like, it's new but it's getting more familiar and you're discovering it and you want to hear it over and over and you're just really into it and then, then you cross over a line where it becomes that much more familiar so when you sing, I think, you try to remember how it was somewhere in that pocket where it was still new but you knew the song and you try to you know, sing it every time like it's precious like you..I don't know..it's very emotional. For me it's very emotional. Not in a sad way but in a meaningful way I feel like when I'm singing I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing it's really comforting to be doing what you feel like you were meant to do it's a safe and wonderful feeling.